"What are you doing cropping Ben's crotch?" — Matthew Bayliss
simon_w"I put the heads in there ... they were crawling around" — janet
Timit"I'm gonna be a vegetarian one day (as he walks into the lounge with a lamb steak sandwich in his hand...)" — Chris
"He has a girlfriend. That might be what he's... doing" — Natalie Moreno
"Josh: What else are women for eh?
Mono: looking at" — Daniel Eggink
Michael - "I like the 3D-animation movies with the 2-level humour in it, like the stuff that kids find funny, but also other humour that adults find funny."
Matt - "Like Borat." — mattcom
Shoeshine didn't say, but was going to say: "One minute in heaven is better than two minutes in heaven." — shoeshine
"Josh: How do people make money these days?
Shoesies: Same way they've always made money: Guns and banks." — shoeshine
"Josh: Jono's the man, I hope he gets in as mayor again.
Shoesies: What, so he's not on the worship team again?" — shoeshine
"(About MJ accidentally inventing the moonwalk): I was just trying to walk forwards!!!" — shoeshine
Nimmo"Two out of three sources spell Wednesday with an O" — tommo39
"Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to live in my head" — Daniel Eggink
"Josh: Are those nipples or really big pimples?
Shoesies: What, the ones on his shoulders?" — shoeshine
"You need to make your hand look more like a hand." — shoeshine
"Natalie: What's the women's [football] team called?
Pete: The White Ferns
Natalie: Wife Ferns?" — Natalie Moreno
"(talking about Miri) She's like a little secret creeping girl!" — shoeshine
"On behalf of Keynes, Keynes would like to say thank you..." — Keynes
"(referring to a Mac Mini) It's like a Big Mac, only smaller!" — shoeshine
"There must be some family-friendly movie with mutated humans somewhere!" — tommo39
MelKeynes "Does anybody know what time it is?"
Josh "TOOL TIME!" — tommo39
"I wasn't asking permission, I was just asking if he minds!" — tommo39
"Do you mind if stupid things you say get published on the internet?" — tommo39
"It looks like part of the USA with a little baby elephant!" — Anthony McGrath
"Hey everybody, look at me! (simulates taking shirt off)" — shoeshine
"Just gotta pick this up, I'm sitting on one of my balls..." — tommo39
"(to Josh) One day we'll get married too, you know!" — Keynes
"Hello, Daniel's phone, Daniel speaking, but a different one." — shoeshine
"But if I assume the foetal position, which actually ironically has nothing to do with feet..." — Daniel Eggink
"@ hotmail and/or gmail, but the and/or's not part of the address" — Daniel Eggink
"(looking at the textbook shelf) Where are the cool books?!" — Daniel Eggink
"There are members of this group who are assholes." — shoeshine
"Yeah well if you pinch my face, I'll pinch your... I'll think of somewhere!" — tommo39
vanTalerie"(about MJ) they shouldn't have announced that he was dead. They should've just got someone to replace him..." — Keynes
"Tom had some water in his bladder thing. It felt like it was full." — janet
"Aw, now I'm going to have to learn the alphabet." — Polly Dacre
"Jesus was like this (extends arms)... and dripping" — Rebecca
"Why do your pants smell like Italian cooking? I have a personal cologne, I call it Pizza. Pizza, the new fragrance from qwandor." — Chris Andreae
Andrew Childs"When I'm disappointed I stay happy for a long time." — Nick Dawbin
"I just realised that there's strategy to this game if you think about it! (2 hours into the game)" — Nick Dawbin
"I have to steal from someone poor and helpless." — Nick Dawbin
"Mark: Imagine having 8 babies.
Janet: Who ate babies?" — janet
"Eric: It's lovely up here, you're not far from home and you've still got...
Layne: 3G.
Eric: I was going to say mountains and hills, but whatever." — Layne PermaneoNomen
"I do have SSH keys, they have passphrases, but apparently it... does it on the tty." — Chris Andreae
qwandor: "So, what are we doing tomorrow?"
lorne: "Chris!" — Andrew Childs
"(whilst watching a DVD) That's the first time I've seen a pregnant woman for this week ay" — Keynes
Chris: "I heard something that vaguely rhymes with that."
lorne: "What rhymes with metamorphosise?"
Chris: "It doesn't sound like that at all actually." — Chris Andreae
"Josh: Back to the Future?
Heston & Keynes: Yeeeeeeeah!" — heston hawe
"If I am playing with Coq, can I say I have a logic probe?" — Andrew Childs
shoeshine"(Whilst deciding where to invade in Risk) Overpopulation does not mean tourism shouldn't happen!!!" — vanTalerie
"I think Japan looks a bit like New Zealand if it got mauled by a raging bear" — shoeshine
"Val head home want sleep go bus miss stop stranded busbus yay adventure wheeee!" — vanTalerie
"When you come into the house, your face takes over everything!" — tommo39
Allan: "I've got a little... not a fridge, the other one..."
CJ: "An oven."
Allan: "Yeah." — Allan E
"Writing isn't a big thing. It's a million little things." — Karpathos
KarpathosDaniel: "Why would Josh be texting Mel? She's right here."
Charlotte: "Why does Josh do anything?"
Daniel: pause "Because he's hungry!"
Josh: "Yeah, well Mel has quenched my hunger before." — tommo39
"Shoeshine: Girls' hearts are relatively...
Josh: Pliable
Shoeshine: Yes. Easier than their brains." — shoeshine
"Patience is a great master plan. It's kept me single a very long time..." — tommo39
Trying to summarise the main point of John 9: "So, Jesus is, like... the ultimate everything..." — Mel
"Try taking a domestic chicken into a forest." — Chris Andreae
"Yeah basically they have like all these historical things at the museum." — jimbobaleena
Antz making mating calls, dogs start barking, "Look, someone's answering!" — jimbobaleena
"If we use methamphetamine, we may as well use marijuana." — Timit
"I suppose if we went over it (Alaska) with a bag of flour... well maybe several bags of flour..." — vanTalerie
"When I was a small child I got beaten up by a type hierarchy.
It was terrible, there were interfaces everywhere!" — Andrew Childs
lorne: "If I ask Stephen whether you are a bug what would he say?"
qwandor: "I am not sure..."
lorne: "'Not a bug, works for me'" — Andrew Childs
Andrew: "What does [Mark] need to go to the doctor for?"
Janet: "About his face." — janet
(outside the tent) "I'm finding this ground really hard to balance on." — Mark
"Antz: Girls are weird, that's why we love them!
Josh: It's not why I love them.
Antz: Why do you love them?
Josh: Cause they're hot!" — tommo39
"(in reference to Wellington Anniversary Day) is it a holiday on monday in wellington too?" — shoeshine
"He cheated on his wife with 10 others, including his wife" — jimbobaleena
"His car makes a tinkly noise. He let me listen to it." — vanTalerie
"I was cooking some stuff in the rice cooker, some rice." — jimbobaleena
No comments (yet). Quoted byjimbobaleena on Sunday 17 January 2010 at 06:25 pm in Mylvaganam Family.
"Steam is hot." — jimbobaleena
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"I wish there were other things you could do with your money on Monopoly, like buy lollies or buy furniture for the house!" — Miriam Mylvaganam
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"But now IS today." — Miriam Mylvaganam
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"You have two eyes. Are YOU are person?" — Miriam Mylvaganam
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"This is how we accumulate junk. We have junk, and it accumulates." — Mel
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"I'll put my arm around you and reach round to get what I want" — Timit
MarkTo matt, regarding dan: "You have raised a violent child!" — jimbobaleena
"See, that's what I've missed! My face has suffered no abuse recently!" — tommo39
"Ryan: Hey Gina, look..Sarah's nose is peeling.
Gina: Leprosy?" — Gina Wong
Ryan.S(to Mark) "My aim is not to kill you, just to cause you pain." — janet
"I have not taken the time to play with Coq yet." — Andrew Childs
"Chris: well some of these status' are just so ambiguous. Are we all just trying to sound mysterious or what?...
Josh: Girls love nothing more than to sound mysterious... why do you think they were all posting the colours of their underwear without explaining to anyone?" — tommo39
Chris"Michele: there's an oxidation pond.
Chris : a what? foxy asian pond? " — Chris W
"Why would you want to start liking a fish?" — Kirsten Meyer
"Do you want me to take your clothes off?" — Chris
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Shoeshine: "You should so name your daughter Beauty."
Tommo: "And your son Beast!" — tommo39No comments (yet). Quoted by
"I should probably take my pants off again." — shoeshine
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"Oh look, there's my phone! That's what happens when you fling lard." — tommo39
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"You can't have a heart to heart with clothes on!" — shoeshine
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"I don't take drugs, doesn't mean I don't inhale them when I get the chance. " — tommo39
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"Did you just spoon with your fork?" — shoeshine
No comments (yet). Quoted bytommo39 on Saturday 02 January 2010 at 06:04 pm in Palmy Boys Roadie 09/010.
"Man this poo is disgusting! Where's the poo scraper?" — tommo39
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"This guy's not letting me turn straight!" — jimbobaleena
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"I propose your face and your mum get punches" — shoeshine
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"I was thinking of drawing a face on my knee and asking it for a kiss" — mattcom
"The league of extraordinary Asians" — mattcom
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"OI! (punches Mike) Ow!" — shoeshine
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"Are you gonna wear clothes?" — jimbobaleena
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"You've gotta jump into the shop, take a pee and hop out again." — mattcom
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"Paul: You're drinking from my personal drink bottle.
Matt: I know, that's cause I'm your personal friend!" — mattcom
"Love is for every time of the night." — Daniel Eggink
No comments (yet). Quoted byqwandor on Friday 01 January 2010 at 07:45 pm in Palmy Boys Roadie 09/010.
"I'm not bisexual I'm bilingual." — shoeshine
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"Or if you're really good at being american use the magic gift button" — Andrew Childs
vipul"Git is simple the way that organic chemistry is simple, in that it is all carbons, hydrogens and oxygens." — Chris Andreae
"Val - We should do this, do you agree?
Josh - I'm getting tired, can't you see?
Val - I'm sorry Josh, I'll go to bed
Josh - lest Kirsten jumps upon your head" — tommo39
"I was sneaking up on them Thi, really I was, but you dispatched them too quickly! (note - Thi wasn't present)" — Chris
via text in response to sport:
"Sadly I cannot didn't u realise it's carols by candlelight tonight and yes that's the gayest message I have ever sent" — Kyle Chard
hugh
Simeon.W"The flat should not have: nasty, claw-out-your-eyes wallpaper or carpet. except as a feature." — shoeshine
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"(upon arriving at a Guy's Night) Where are the girls???" — Kelvin
"But if it's running on Linux, then it's... not running on Windows." — Andrew Childs
"they've got such beautiful legs - It's like watching horses race" — Peter
"I'm going to take a whiz. For an extended period of time." — Chris
"It could be the holy grail of Aslan or something" — mattcom
"Yeah I think I have $10. It's just got to get me to Christchurch." — Hannah Murphy
"Have you never bounced around on your bum before?" — vanTalerie
(points to Simon) "Your third-world country is fail!" — Donald Gordon
"I don't feel the need to be complimentary because I don't think you're under any illusions that I think you look weird. " — tommo39
"Let's take the meths and go somewhere and do something" — tommo39
"Did you guys take the car for a walk? " — Peta-Maria Harris
"Thank you my father and my mother. Without them I wouldn't be here." — Kelvin
"There's nothing intellectual about creating different shaped poos" — James Duxfield
"Do you guys have fresh vegetables in America?" — Peta-Maria Harris
Tommo: "I'm looking at the man in the mirror"
shoeshine: "Except she's a woman" — shoeshine
"Naomi: You're Dumbo the elephant
Josh: Your Mum's a... oh wait, she's my Mum too." — tommo39
"I'm gonna see if any hot chicks want lunch. I hear they eat" — Nick Dawbin
"I think that's the first time I've ever spent five hours in a bath tub" — Nick Dawbin
"We should all get girlfriends next year
I'm now tempted to quote that
but then that would kinda give the game away to all the girls who read it" — tommo39
"Josh: We've got a formula for burger satisfaction Mono!
Mono: YEAH!!!!" — Daniel Eggink
"Impotent = you can play with it but you won't get anything out of it" — Andrew Cr
superspring"You've got to open the door to see if it's closed" — Daniel Eggink
"I'm always having a dance party in Andrew's room." — Daniel Mudford
Stevie: "Or we could just pop some herbals and do some E."
Allan: "I'm all for it, eh." — Allan Chesswas
On putting a V8 in a Prius: "Well it wouldn't be a Prius anymore, would it? It'd be a Previous." — Daniel Eggink
"Except I'm not Mono anymore, I'm now Stereo." — Daniel Eggink
"Jehovah's Witnesses always seem to have really nice hair in the pictures. It's 'cause they use Dove shampoo." — Daniel Mudford
To Evan & Tim: "You keep going after my balls!" — Chris
No comments (yet). Quoted bycharleynz on Sunday 15 November 2009 at 10:26 am in Sarah and Mel's flat.
After some elephant in the fridge jokes... Josh's dad: "How do you get Josh out of the fridge?!" Josh: "Open the pantry!" — tommo39
"Matt: How many of these make a certain amount?
Shoeshine: That many." — shoeshine
"Matt: Where do the monsters live?
Josh: in the e!" — tommo39
Jose"For a moment I was really concerned that we were going to set this place on fire." — Kirsten Meyer
"I thought the secret to immortality was to have no life." — Simeon.W
"I just know that there's one that I know, and there's the one that I don't know, and then there's Felicity." — tommo39
"It's ok, I'm not going to date either of you two" (to Mel and Shirley) — tommo39
Committee: "We could have an Archi-plet and a Law-plet..." Gina: "Yeah!" Ryan: "And a gaming plet!!!" Gina: "NO." — Gina Wong
Ryan got temporarily sidetracked by trying to drag off Gina at the lights... Van: "Eh, eh, eh, concentrate, lah!" Miri: "Don't drive with too much faith!" — Miriam Mylvaganam
Between taking off glasses and putting on prescription sunglasses while DRIVING: "Oh, I can't see!" After horrified responses from 5 girls, Van says: "This fella drives by faith, not by sight!" Miri: "Hence the cross!" (hanging from the rear view mirror) — Ryan.S
To Justine: "You look different... oh, it must be because you don't have makeup on." blank look "Oh, nah, it looks good!!" — Peng Wong
"Josh: It's a density of the poo thing
Val: No it's not, it's a... why are we discussing this?!" — vanTalerie
"Put on some short shorts, some pantyhose and... some sunscreen and you'll be fine." — Simeon.W
"There's a fine line between teaching and just being an ass." — Phil Luey
"Josh: How much are you supposed to flirt with someone when you're talking to them on facebook?
Val: A decent amount" — vanTalerie
I'm trying to imagine on what planet there'd be a quote that goes "There's things Val doesn't talk about that you talk about". — tommo39
"I understand hope is an insane and terrible thing" — vanTalerie
"Does anyone want an old peanut butter sandwich that I made last night?" — Mark
"Josh: @Sid give me something to procrastinate about and I shall.
Sid: Ok, I'll do that tomorrow" — Sid Bachtiar
(misheard as saying) "We're all asian right now." — Hannah Gao
Tommo: "'tis all very cute"
Shoeshine: "What is?"
Tommo: "Girls liking guys" — tommo39
"Why would I buy you McDonald's? You have a job!" — Simeon.W
"Simeon: I have never been on a man date.
Yale: it was a mate." — Yale.
"If you want to understand why humour is so funny..." — Stevie
"Shoeshine: Why is it that nice looking guitars sound crap and ugly ones sound good?
Tommo: Just like girls" — tommo39
"Being dead for a year doesn't make you not age." — shoeshine
"No one's gonna need the bathroom any time soon are they?" — Timit
"Beating people up is completely different to gay sex though." — Allan Chesswas
"The tweeter that tweeted the tweet that twitter texted to me was a girl." — tommo39
Ben: "where's Paul?"
Shoeshine: "He's dancing naked in the other room." — shoeshine
"(to Paul) Would you like to go back to old times and sleep with me?" — tommo39
Josh: "Paul, this is a mixed flat. The girls will be up before you in the morning and they'll go into that room and they will think you're sleeping in here."
Shoeshine: "So take all your clothes off" — shoeshine
"Aww. That just makes me want to hug myself." — Daniel Mudford
"Some companies have Friday afternoon drinks. We have Friday afternoon arguing-about-authentication-schemes." — Chris Andreae
Stephen: "if you assume no central server and no direct tcp, then what?"
lorne: "if you assume an orange is playing Beethoven on a monkey then what?"
Stephen: "sweet, furry navels that sound good?" — stephen
"(2 days before honours is due) I should put my results in ..." — hugh
Everytime somebody writes "psuedocode" in their report, they must replace it with make-believe code — vipul
"It's almost as if tomorrow never happened!" — Kirsten Meyer
"like I could have slipped, knocked my head on the red one, got my foot stuck in the green one, fell down with my foot still stuck, knocked my head on the blue one.. then fell to the ground. BAMMM!! HEAD FIRST DEAD!" — justcallmemel
"Sigmund Freud? Who's he? Was he a ladies' man?" — Daniel Mudford
"You guys are mental you know that? You're going to come out of this place needing to go to an asylum." — David Pearce
"Playing with your opposite hand makes you feel like a poof" — richard
"(to the tune of highway to hell) I'm on a Road to Perdition!" — mattcom
"(In reference to woolies across the road) It's like a pantry except outside, and you have to pay to get stuff out." — shoeshine
"(To Hugh) It's your taste in Stephen's jazz" — Carlton Downey
"I hate being blind - you can't see anything." — Nick Dawbin
"Emos have heart problems - it beats when they don't want it to." — tommo39
"Normally either I lose when I'm bluffing... or I win." — Jose
"I didn't even realise there was an 8 O Clock AM" — Nick Dawbin
"You know Carlton isn't the smartest knife in the drawer" — hugh
Andrew: "What are you making, Tim?"
Tim: "An onion with a high voice." — Timit
"It's fancy dress. Josh [Thompson] is going to go as himself, as he considers himself a fairy." — Timit
(Talking about dance moves)
"If you put your head on your left shoulder, and move around like it's stuck there, that's a pretty awesome move. You can use your right shoulder too." — Daniel Mudford
"Riding a bike is like riding a bike, supposedly you never forget how." — Luke McCrohon
stephen"Josh: So what happens next?
Shoeshine: I take my clothes off" — shoeshine
"Shoeshine: How do you know people on the internet?
Josh: Well you just meet them
Shoeshine: But you don't!" — shoeshine
"Darkness is the absence of light.
Boot is the absence of car." — shoeshine
"Everyone knows someone who wasn't an orphan, for example." — Andrew Childs
"You have a lot of stupid ideas which are probably right. " — narborg
narborg"I don’t like the word challenge, I prefer the tern heavily encourage." — James Allaway
"What going on in Wellington though, you’re all single.
Even: We’re not dodgy." — Annabe Van Den Berg
"Gods not from Dunedin, and he will get over it." — Mark Grace
"Even: Was it a dodgy joke?
Lauren: No.
Even: I don’t get it then." — Evan Dawber
"Lauran: Like making babies.
Even: That’s not productive." — Evan Dawber
"Lauran: Are you a communist or a Christian?
Rachel: Well I tend to sit on the fence." — Lauren Crosland
"What? Did Nathan ask Jasmine to marry him?" — Annabe Van Den Berg
"Nathan and Yomcat would make a good couple (I remember it being “should get together sometime...)" — Nigel Pollock
"Do you want babies? I want babies! We should get together sometime and....." — Natalie Moreno
"Nigel: I thought if you were good you got a girlfriend and a car. How came I ended up in prison?
Mark Grace: The Girlfriend." — Nigel Pollock
"How many incrimination photos of me do you need?" — Karen Lau
"Yomcat: So what did you learn about?
Ben: About a lonely guy in jail. (Paul)" — yomcat
"I’m not really interested in your satanic message at the moment, maybe later." — Evan Dawber
"I’ve never been to a SLC where I’ve been offered cheese." — Val Goold
"I’d do it myself, but I’m not that way inclined." — Evan Dawber
Kirsten: "They were like a perfect family."
Aaron: "Perfect?"
Kirsten: "Well, they're from the US." — Kirsten Meyer
"You aren't really getting high performance spanking out of that." — Stephen
"That's what I'd be doing. If I had a girlfriend, I'd be doing my hair." — Daniel Mudford
"Wow, I thought that was an electronic thing, then I realised it was real." — Boris
"I'll set this going and then I'll come and play with your thingy." — Raja
mattcom"I was about to say something insightful and wisdomly" — mattcom
(about a boy competing in the Speedcubing championships) "I want to put him in a box and take him home." — Peta-Maria Harris
"I think I almost have a stomach like a boy" — Peta-Maria Harris
"Last week in front of Levin Church;
Graham said to Trish “ can you turn me on please” in reference to microphone switch. Much laughter, from congregation; to which Trish replied “ Not now dear ” – more laughter." — Graham Lee
walbrannPippa - "Eni, is that male or female?"
Graham - "No they are Samoan" — Graham Lee
"You can't be judge, jury, executioner and Jesus!" — Nick Dawbin
Nathan: "How is CU going?"
Kirsten: "It great 'cause there are ... quite a few boys. Not enough yet, but..." — Kirsten Meyer
"But I'm not ready to commit, I have commitment issues." — Boris
"[While looking at his phone] That's not my beautiful stapler!" — simon_w
"invite her round, it'll be a friendly thing with the three of us and we won't kiss her 'til the end." — mattcom
"Because it makes me sound up myself and I'm really quite humble." (complaining about me adding quotes logged in as him.) — mattcom
"I don't have your base instincts. I'm not like a caveman running after a mammoth taking a bite every now and then" — mattcom
"What are Daniel Collis' boxers doing in our hallway?" — shoeshine
"This is a UHF coathanger" (when attempting to tune our TV to prime) — mattcom
"Then you'd have black and white and you could make a piano out of rice." — tommo39
"Could you have possibly made this anymore impossible!?!" — Jeremy
"Yale: Its... ITS WORKING!!!
Me:BUUUUAAAAAA!!!
Yale: BUUUUAAAAAA!!!
Me:BUUUUAAAAAA!!!
Yale: BUUUUAAAAAA!!!
Me:BUUUUAAAAAAaaaaaa...." — Yale.
"I don't think I could get any work done, you guys distract me too much." — Kyle Chard
"Many people, such as this one (points at lorne)..." — Chris Andreae
"Josh: I want a sleeping bag with sleeves.
PM: It'd be a sleeping suit!" — Peta-Maria Harris
yomcat"(to Josh), did you sleep at all last night J.A.?" — Peta-Maria Harris
"Filipinos don't age. If I went to a church full of Filipino girls there wouldn't be much incentive to go anywhere else." — tommo39
"I pictured meat with a much deeper voice than that" — Kirsten Meyer
"No Kirsten, I will not forgive you for your face." — James Duxfield
"Kirsten didn't say how much wrinkly skin is going to fit into the red dress" — tommo39
"Mel, you can put your skull in my cupboard if you want" — tommo39
"Sweet Chili Philly is supposed to be heaven isn't it? Oh no, it's a piece of heaven, so it must be a piece of a Tim Tam." — James Duxfield
"New Zealand's taking over the world, one cow at a time." — Sarah Larsen
"Yeah some people sound really weird over the phone... except the ones who don't" — Mel
"Karen: The voices in my head tell me that I'm normal.
Esther: The voices in my head tell me you're not normal." — Karen Lau
"Yeah it's true, every year people got shorter... no wait it was the other way 'round - people got taller. I got shorter. " — Sarah Larsen
"I'm gonna go to sleep first then I'm gonna go to bed." — Mel
"When was the last time I got frustrated at bits of plastic??" — tommo39
"Well I'm not really that passionate about vegetables." — tommo39
"Yeah I prefer borrowing [Mel's] books because then I don't have to return them." — tommo39
"It was the carrot with the spatula in the kitchen killing the salad." — Richard
"I had Silly time with Stevie at the Supermarket." — Richard
"Caryn: What, so you think we should get rid of all drugs?
Richard: Well, maybe not ALL drugs..." — Richard
"Yeah I can't really say I've ever heard voices... I mean sometimes I talk to myself but that doesn't really count." — tommo39
"I want drugs. (Sarah)
Well, which ones would you like? I've got... (Kirsten)" — Sarah Larsen
"Yes but you (Josh) do it in an annoying way whereas you (Kirsten) do it in an intelligent way." — Mel
"I just realized that if I die tomorrow, no one would know... and I wouldn't be able to tell you!" — Mel
"i actually find the concept of having someome to care for you and be with you forever quite comforting. Like a second Jesus." — Nick Dawbin
"o yea yes, i think, i hope, maybe not, probably not, no" — Nick Dawbin
"Brought to you by the letter C and the number L." — tommo39
"COD4? But what are you going to do with your old CPU?" — Paul McConachy
"If you add enough eggs you get mayonaise, but it doesn't really count. Objective C++ is like mayonaise." — Chris Andreae
"None of you are Thong, so I'm going to stop talking." — Nahum
"Stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid." — simon_w
"But I ate the mince with the beans that I ate with the mince!" — tommo39
"It'd be the equivalent of a hippie stoner apartment, but without the hippies or the stoners..." — Nick Dawbin
"Yeah, it's good all ground music (referring to foreground and background music, Wandering Eye by Fat Freddy's Drop)" — Nick Dawbin
"I feel like the blanket man, I don't have a warm house to come home to." — Jon Lee
"(in reference to tetris) It just raped me." — Anthony McGrath
"There are some people who just never have fun" — Kirsten Meyer
"I've just realised how different it's going to be living with people." — Peta-Maria Harris
"Chips aren't instant! You have to cook them for 20min AND heat it up first... it takes nearly 3/4 of an hour!" — Sarah Larsen
"Kirsten... oh yeah, she's the one with the foot." — vanTalerie
"It's a weird thing for guys to be into... cats can't beat you up" — Peter
"Kirsten: My friends would be interested in a dress-up party
Peter: Oh yeah, mine too" — Peter
"It doesn't need to be accurate, I am Jesus, Mohammed and Buddha!" — Nick Dawbin
"Ok, enough gossiping... actually we can keep gossiping. " — Mel
"Kirsten: We're going to change the world.
Peta-Maria: Yep, and we've got to discuss it first." — Peta-Maria Harris
"Then there's the people who embody the crazy cow game... you think you've got them all figured out but nooo... the red head goes with the green body." — Richard
"I think I could be a better missionary if I had a British accent." — Peta-Maria Harris
"('feline' and 'female') Oh well they both have fe in them, it's just one's a line and one's a male." — Sarah Larsen
"Retreat... more like an intensive concentration camp (referring to CU committee retreats)" — Sarah Larsen
"Girls who work at the bakery are better than girls who work at the deli." — Richard
"Your husbands can all die at age 60... ok fine, 70, and we can all live together for the next ten years and then die too!" — Kirsten Meyer
"God is our father and Kirsten is our mother." — Peta-Maria Harris
"There's this one knife, it's really very aesthetically pleasing..." — Kirsten Meyer
"Oh yeah, it's your funeral tomorrow (Sarah). " — Kirsten Meyer
"I wouldn't really have a problem with licking the toilet seat." — Kirsten Meyer
"I get invigorated by people when I'm leaving them." — Kirsten Meyer
"Mono: It's the thought that counts.
Josh: Yes, because we THOUGHT that someone would bring chips." — tommo39
Lewisham"You can cook yourself in the microwave first." — Kirsten Meyer
"I'm not serious.
I'm being sarcastic.
I'm not joking." — qwandor
"Sarah I love you and I want to have your ba- wait, that doesn't quite work, does it?" — Richard
"Evil isn't like confronting an army... it's like having a bath" — Peter
Natalie: "Hitler was Christian"
Hamish: "No, he was Austrian" — Hamish Stewart
Natalie: "I forget that you aren't girls"
Matthew: "Yet"
Jack: "I don't get it, why are we all going to be chicks later?" — Jack Sutherland
Jack: "Who wants to hear about my week"
Simon: "Nah" — simon_w
"And then they have a black baby. What to do with it? Eat it? kill it? or..." — Hamish Stewart
"[I would turn gay for] A black man, as he would satisfy my needs." — Jack Sutherland
"There's a lot of random crap in the bible" — Jack Sutherland
"Is that a camera? Are you filming my crotch?" — Jack Sutherland
"You like to climb your man, don't you James?" — Jack Sutherland
"Chop up little kids and put them in the car" — Natalie Moreno
"There's something funny about flinging poo" — Natalie Moreno
"It's ok, I'm used to guys staring at me" — Peta-Maria Harris
"So wait, I'm just a gondola away from achieving this! (rolling to and from work)" — Natalie Moreno
"that was supposed to be a really humane rat trap! We don't have any tomatoes!" — Kirsten Meyer
"Some people look at it and see a women, some people look at it and see a fish." — Raja
"That's what you have nose hairs for. So they can filter out the ghosts so that they don't filter in and change your personality" — Kirsten Meyer
"Do you want a fingerless glove? I'd be happy to relinquish one" — Kirsten Meyer
"I can't remember what dipsticks usually look like" — Peta-Maria Harris
(Over dinner) "did you know that some people take methamphetamine anally? — Kirsten Meyer
"you mean making soup starting with just pea peas?" — Kirsten Meyer
"I really can't imagine a mini Ben. He's just so... big." — Mel
"In contrast to that, don't worry too much about the future, cause it hasn't happened yet." — shoeshine
"See that, that is Natasha Bedingfield, and that is Daniel Bedingfield without a head" — Ben Eichler
Shirley: "If someone was interested in knowing more about God, what would you say to them?"
Josh: "read the book of leviticus" — tommo39
Shoeshine: "Trust the English one, ay?"
Josh: "No, never trust English people" — tommo39
Shoeshine: "Josh"
Josh: "Yes?"
Shoeshine: "There is no donkey language"
Josh: "How do you know?"
Paul: "Yeah, how do you know?" — shoeshine
"The place of no return see, cause we're gonna close the door, and then there'll be no return." — tommo39
"Aah, I'm falling into the recreational swimming pool!" — tommo39
Paul: "you guys are all crazy"
Josh: "you're the one making a pyramid out of a donkey" — tommo39
"oh, and there's a beach. And that's really cool, cause we like, live in Palmy, and there's no water" — shoeshine
Josh: "So we could just believe that ants are taking over the world with their special nuclear honey."
Paul: "Ants don't make honey."
Josh: "Oh that's bees! Sorry, my bad" — tommo39
"See the problem with conspiracy theories is they make everything so complicated, it's much simpler to just believe stuff." — shoeshine
"Ah but how do you know that this is Gisborne, and maybe it's Palmy except it disguised itself as Gisborne and the other one is actually Gisborne and not Palmy" — tommo39
Josh: "And that's Friar Tuck"
Paul: "He's naughty, cause he spanked her bum" — Paul McConachy
"The llama is a cross between a donkey and a sheep. Can you see the resemblance?" — tommo39
"And then Osama Bin Laden, he was over here. And he got the sheep to attack George Bush." — tommo39
"you see, this is the only place in the world where people build a wall using a recreational swimming pool" — tommo39
Josh: "So Shoeshine, what do you think of Gisborne?"
Paul: "Hey, what do you think of this?" (camera turns to Paul's creation)
Shoeshine: "Hey, back to me! I'm important!" — shoeshine
"Ah, now you see, Blaketopia is actually just the republicisized international local version of... South Africa" — tommo39
Shirley: "So what's your favourite food, what do you like to eat?"
Josh: "Lasagne!"
Shoeshine: "Pizza!"
Ben: "Chocolate!
Paul: "Yeah, I think a mix..." — Paul McConachy
Paul: "Anyway, I think you should get Shoeshine to do the funny thing"
Josh: "Shoeshine, do something funny"
Shoeshine: "Josh, take the seat" — shoeshine
Paul: "The cat has something to say. Lick my finger."
Shoeshine: "Hey the cat's upstaged me"
Josh: "I'll lick your finger Paul" — tommo39
Josh: "We apologise for Shoeshine talking"
Paul: "Sorry, we want you to do it all in sign language" — Paul McConachy
Shirley: "How did you get the band name Cubed?"
Paul: "Every other name was taken wasn't it?" — Paul McConachy
Shirley: "How did you avoid getting into the alcohol and drugs then?"
Shoeshine: "We just didn't know the right people" — shoeshine
"I usually focus on one thing, and then... (turns around) ooh" — Paul McConachy
Shoeshine: "Obviously we can't speak from experience cause we haven't done the drugs and alcohol"
Josh: "We can't afford them" — tommo39
Ben: "To answer the original question, you can find happiness outside of alcohol and drugs"
Shoeshine: "What, and you can't find it in them?" — shoeshine
(holding up one of the Kings of Orient figurines) Josh: "And then this person over here... who the heck is that?"
Paul: "It looks like a gorilla" — Paul McConachy
(holding up a baby Jesus figurine) "This is Michael. And he's a... he's a pig" — tommo39
Josh: "I think that Shoeshine's pretty good looking"
Paul: "hahahahaha"
Shoeshine: "Thanks for the vote of confidence Paul" — Paul McConachy
"...trolling public transport with my arse..." — Chris Andreae
thesquib"I'm not sure what it's called when you upset people by making an offensive smell." — Chris Andreae
"John: “Just don't lick anyone.” Gaetan: “Whoops.”" — Gaetan
"I was going to say that I had a different sort of Sharpie in my pocket, but actually I left it at home." — Donald Gordon
"If we were going to just stick to the letter of the law, we should do it everywhere, and do a proper half-arsed job." — Chris Andreae
Donald: "I have a new device for Chris James to port to."
Chris: "Your pants?" — Chris Andreae
"Hey Thong, can you try taste one of these and see if it's salty enough?" — Raja
"I have to get up fifteen minutes early to get through the stuff on my floor." — Paul McConachy
"The thing is, I've played lots of role playing games over the years..." — Nahum
Sam: "So you're hangry then."
Chris: "Hangry?"
Sam: "Hungry and angry." — thesquib
Aly"You hold me down, and Geoff will funnel it into my mouth" — Carlton Downey
databmoose"It was all very ... incestual, without the actual incest.
He wasn't the one who was licking my feet, so it was alright." — Fiona McKenzie
"He's English, but has a facade of being completely normal." — Fiona McKenzie
Neil: "Alli told me you broke your tool."
Stephen: "It didn't break, it just didn't fit properly." — stephen
"What is the thing which you can't see? They were showing it off in the demos." — stephen
"Stephen: I could get out my iPod shuffle. Vipul: And do what? Stephen: Sniff it!" — stephen
"Try not to change too much stuff, or I'll kill you." — Thong
"If at first you don't succeed, try try try again... With another girl. " — Paul McConachy
"There were first years. And then there was food." — Melanie Nelson
"I've come up with a cunning plan. It's cunning in its cunningness. I'm using aspects to weave my reporting into my aspects." — stephen
(to Richard) "Give me one of your nuts, from the sack." — Stevie
"You can't do some things to machines that you can do to people." — Comradepara
"I just want to do something. Without doing anything. You know what I mean." — stephen
(pointing at a magnet on the fridge) "Oh, that's not the flat card, is it?" — Daniel Mudford
"Oy freakin' oy... listen listen... What the hell? - Matt
You should be a rapper, 'Oy freakin oy listen listen what the hell.' - Daniel" — shoeshine
"We could all put our beds in that room and use the rest as a flipping orgy." — mattcom
"We should subdivide the garage and have some israelis in there." — mattcom
"Stephen's not here, so I can't drive him up the wall." — Alex Potanin
"I don't have too many viruses because I don't use Windows that often." — Comradepara
"I didn't mean that Stephen. I'm actually a nice person." — Kyle Chard
"Yo mamma so fat she has to index her shoelaces to find them." — Stephen
"I've had budgies, you wouldn't want them in your speedos" — stephen
(about African children) "They're expensive now. $1.50." — vipul
"It would be good if there were a website where you could enter your girlfriend's birthday and address, and it would deal with presents and everything. I would be willing to pay $10 a year for that. Birthdays, Christmas, Valentine's Day..." — Kyle Chard
"Quick, someone give me the smallest prime number less than the max integer size!" — Carlton Downey
(talking about the space inside one of the bench seats in our dining room) "You could put babies in there." — Kirsten Meyer
janet"If they're rich enough to buy a mac, why are they still orphans?" — Comradepara
"and right now I really have to dash, currently I am inside a mental hospital.
...
Repairing their computer." — Comradepara
"I used to wear budgie-smugglers every day. It took me until I was 16 to work out that that was not what people normally wear to the beach." — Carlton Downey
Carlton: "The question is, is your shit better than my shit?"
Alex: "We'll have to find out." — Carlton Downey
(to Stevie, about Richard, as he and Sarah go into the corridor to say goodbye) "He will meet you outside in 2 minutes. That's all it takes." — Peta-Maria Harris
"If you turn the knob to just the right setting, you can make a guy sound like a girl." — tommo39
(following a conversation about castration) "Seriously, I have a device upstairs. I can make you sound like a chipmunk." — tommo39
"I haven't brushed my teeth in like 2 and a half days.
I'll have to shave them before I brush them." — Peter
"You know you can't levitate with two broken legs." — James Duxfield
Elaine: "Do you know what a pinafore is?"
Peter: "It's like a tea-towel."
...
Josiah: "Do you mean an apron?
...
It must be something to do with Peter's head." — Peter
(Talking about Pete being shaved at SLC) "Oh yeah, coz girls don't know what it's like to shave your face." — Peter
Pek Yi: "It looks better on me than it does on Ruth. It doesn't suit her."
Josiah: "Isn't that why they have mirrors in stores?"
Ruth: "It was given to me!" — Jose
(Andrew is pointing a laser through dust particles.)
"Is that what electricity looks like?
...
I don't know, I don't do science." — Peter
"Just remember, age isn't necessarily wisdom — because a lot of old people are senile." — Jose
Peter: "Are you actually blonde?"
Ruth: "I've got blonde roots."
Peter: "Oh, so your grandparents were blonde?" — Peter
Janice: "Yeah, movies are cheaper in Malaysia..."
Josiah: "That's 'cause you guys have slave labour over there." — Jose
Peter: "I hate bringing my work home."
Josiah: "If you brought your work home that would be luggage." — Jose
(about his fly) "I've just given up trying to keep it up." — Peter
"(to Neil) Are you free tonight? ... late, tonight?" — Clinton Scott
memphis-stereoMark: "What animal is ham from?"
Janet: "Hamster." (bursts out laughing) — janet
"Vipul: I do have a secret stash of spoons and forks. Stephen: You could use it to make a fork bomb!" — vipul
"There's only one thing better than an attractive women, an attractive women with a box." — superspring
"We waxed one of my mates for fun, on a ski trip." — Carlton Downey
"Hugh: I've been doing it by myself for years. Neil: That's what she said." — hugh
"That's alright. I like playing with other people's balls." — Craig Anslow
"I watched porn all summer and was beaten by my parents." — Neil Ramsay
"I've never noticed that error, I thought it was normal" — Boris
"It's like a violin case, except it's a coat hanger" — Comradepara
"Took me four tries to find the right entrance." — Andrew Childs
"I am going to have a terminal party, no-one shall survive." — Neil Ramsay
"Kyle: He must have been a black man. Stephen: I don't know if he's black or not. Kyle: That's racist." — Kyle Chard
"Mina: Hey, wanna rape me down an alley? Kyle: Not me!" — Kyle Chard
"I want to be mindless and without future." — Dmitri Koudrin
"If you don't punch a monkey, you're a traitor to your species." — Stuart Marshall
"I've been threatened with an apple before..." — Peter Komisarczuk
"It's kinda scary when it pops out in front of you." — Kyle Chard
"I saw the goats, they're sexy goats, I'll give you that much." — databmoose
"Kyle: I think me and Kris should be together. Kris: What colour are your balls?" — Kyle Chard
"Andrew pleased Alex yesterday, and I was wondering how I could do it." — vipul
"I wouldn't wait, I'd just go kill people in real life." — Jonathan Bartlett
"Paley: Both ways seem really tight. Cat: That's what she said." — Paley Li
"I love this girl. I think she's affection. I can't get it off." — Paley Li
"I just said it was dead, I didn't say it wasn't alive." — Jessica Campbell
"You guys are obsessed with Snickers, seriously." — superspring
memphis-wiki"We need to find some kind of lubricant which won't damage the latex." — stephen
"Sorry, I didn't hear you, I was too busy chewing on my nuts." — Seby Kruger
"It's really hard to see when it gets dark. It's really annoying." — Matthew Kiernan
"Are you one of those ambiguous sexuality types?" — Kyle Chard
"Lets get my stuff and go home together." — Constantine Dymnikov
"You don't fix your baby unless you don't want grandkids." — Jonathan Bartlett
"I can't do it with something this floppy." — Blaise Drinkwater
"This is orgy programming! Everyone is just sticking in whatever they want!" — Andrew Childs
"Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, I can go up, right, left and down" — vipul
"I was trying to get it up but i couldnt find the sticky stuff" — Lingzi Zi
"I talked to her on the phone on Monday and you wouldn't know she was blind at all" — Ben Bradshaw
"Let's abstract this, cars are just moving walls" — Constantine Dymnikov
"Portégé, it's like how you spell cabbage." — Matthew Kiernan
"Worst user interface ever... I think this tops the hell website(on stereo)" — Eddie Stanley
"I feel like tearing off my clothes and going into battle" — vipul
"Opera has built-in G-String, doesn't it?”" — Matt Bonniface
"Last time I left it too late, I almost screwed myself!" — Ben Bradshaw
"I hate people who use fractions, they should all be rounded up" — Luke McCrohon
"Alex is a customer, we must satisfy his needs" — Carlton Downey
"(while drunk) They expect you to pull things out of your ass, so get your hand in there and grab." — Chris Andreae
"Neil [Leslie] has his finger in International Students" — Kim Chirnside
New quote"When I saw Kim this morning, I was so excited I unzipped my pants!" — David Keane